Diary of Ralph Josselin (Private Collection)

4.6.1650 (Tuesday 4 June 1650)

document 70004965

4: This day my dear friend Mrs Mary Church and my sweet Ralph were buried together in the church, I preached her funeral on Mathew. 25. 34 verse god has taken from me a choice special friend, the good Lord in mercy sanctify that his dealing unto me, and truly my heart looks wholly to god herein, who is my life, my grace, my all, I am poor and empty. in some respect I see great mercy therein, for Satan lies in wait to corrupt our affections and that mine were not, was gods abundant grace, who keeps me that though I fall yet I am not utterly cast down. when Mrs Mary died, my heart trembled, and was perplexed in the dealings of the lord so sadly with us, and desiring god not to proceed on against us with his darts and arrows, looking back into my ways, and observing why god had thus dealt with me, the lord followed me with that sin no more unless a worse thing happen to you, and the intimation of god was he would proceed no further against me or mine, and he would assist me with his grace if I cleaved to him with a full purpose of heart, which I resolve, oh my god help me, oh my god fail me not, for in thee do I put my trust.